★ NOW HEARING: HE LEFT ME ON READ FOR 4 HOURS★ PETTY CRIMES WELCOME★ JUDGE POOKIE PRESIDING★ NOT REAL LEGAL ADVICE OBVIOUSLY★ FILE YOUR CASE FREE★ THE COURT IS UNHINGED BUT FAIR★ NOW HEARING: HE LEFT ME ON READ FOR 4 HOURS★ PETTY CRIMES WELCOME★ JUDGE POOKIE PRESIDING★ NOT REAL LEGAL ADVICE OBVIOUSLY★ FILE YOUR CASE FREE★ THE COURT IS UNHINGED BUT FAIR
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POO-2026-A9A2Relationship DramaDrama: 3/10
Parties
Akash v. Levi
The Tea (Plaintiff's Statement)

She is going on a family trip, and I am going to miss her

Demands

10 kisses

Final Verdict
CASE DISMISSED
Judgment

MISSING YOUR PERSON IS NOT A CRIME, IT'S JUST LOVE

Court Reasoning

Pookie, I have reviewed the evidence and I regret to inform you that missing someone who is on a family trip is NOT a prosecutable offense. In fact, it is called being a caring partner. Levi has committed no wrongdoing by having a family that takes trips. The audacity of families, I know. This court finds that the demand of 10 kisses is reasonable, valid, and frankly conservative. We support this ask wholeheartedly.

Sentence

Levi must return from said family trip with 10 kisses PLUS one souvenir snack from wherever she went, no exceptions. Akash must send at least one 'I miss you' text daily to keep the vibes alive.

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